Phuket’s night life - something for everybody’s taste
After three days
of following Chinese people on Vegetarian festival (about that in my next blog)
and after long hours of being lazy at the beach we decided it’s time to move
our cute bottoms and explore more of this incredibly fascinating island of
Phuket and it’s night life.
We rented a
scooter as it seemed silly to spend most of our budget on taxi, which is
really overrated, comparing to everything else. It turn out to be the best
decision ever, as the temperature was perfect, traffic wasn’t too bad, probably
because October is low season and beside the fact we saved huge amount of Baht (Thai currency), we ended up seeing much more of local life than we could ever do in taxi.
My Love and myself at this stage in life we don’t have kids so we have the luxury of time for ourselves, but night clubbing, drinking and that sort of
things aren’t our game anymore. We left that style some time ago as we entered
thirties. So after browsing endless number
of leaflets and web pages we chose Simon Cabaret show as our first night out
destination.
It’s a lady boys
show, and I was very curious about it as I never saw a lady boy before. “Let
your imagination fly” is their logline and I felt, as a very promising show is
about to start in this luxurious theatre with high-tech sound and lighting
equipment. The curtain came up, amazingly beautiful creatures with even more
stunning and glamorous costumes came on stage and they start to sing. Sing?!!!?
ON PLAY BACK… oh what a disappointment, as most of them were mainly out of
sync… Was it too hard to learn the lyrics of the songs? And as the show
progressed I realized that many of them don’t know how to dance either, and it felt,
as they were hangers for outstanding, extravagant costumes…  |
| My Love and his favourite performer :) |
So, being unable to
enjoy their performance I studied their looks. How amazingly beautiful and
feminine some of them look like… and I admit I look a lot in their pelvic area trying to find a clue that shows that they are actually man beneath those
amazing “bikini” dresses, but the sign I was looking for wasn’t there… some of
them looked like 100% woman, and more… anyway, even though their performing
wasn’t up to Las Vegas standards, time went really quick and I have to give
them some credit as most of them walked and danced in more sensual way than
lots of women I know, including myself… we took some photos after the show as
they were grabbing us along other tourists to make an extra buck and in that
point they weren’t so classy and feminine anymore. For 900 Baht (app. 30 AUD) I
satisfied my curiosity about lady boys and we giggled a lot, we had fun in our
own way so at the end it felt like worth going.
Next day, we decided
that we need something to spice our holiday a little as last night felt like a retirement
break, so even though we are not into drinking and clubs we thought to give a go
to the Soi Bangla road, the most fringe street of Patong.
After the sunset, traffic gets closed and this street becomes a liveliest party zone with huge variety of beautiful girls and
ladyboys from all over the world with aim to please you hoping you’ll take them
for the night… I hold my Love’s hand very tight as I saw the look in his eyes
which reminded me of a look a chubby boy would have in a candy shop… A girl
or a boy (it’s hard to tell) approached us offering to take us to free of
charge ping pong show… Heard some stories about it, and why not? My Love tried
to tell me that it could be little bit too much, but I was convinced, as girl
said we just pay for the drinks, show is free of charge and we can stay or leave when ever we want…Sound naive, ha? So we climbed the stairs, passing by
some very dodgy looking characters that make you wonder will it be so easy to
get out, as it is to get in. And there we were, in this small and dirty
nightclub with too loud music and too little light. On a small stage, right in
front of our table three beautiful women were sensually moving their naked
bodies. Waitress came with the drink
list, and that was the first shock: they charge 900 Baht for a beer which
outside costs 80 Baht…I said no, we are not staying, no way I’m paying that
much for the beer! My Love grabbed my hand saying: “you can’t just leave now,
remember those dodgy characters?” Because of load music I didn’t hear him well
so I kept on insisting that price is too much and the waiter who saw Croatian
bully in me said we could have two beers for 1000 Baht (app. 34 AUD). Ok, we
stayed seated not knowing that those dodgy characters anyway won’t let you out until you buy some drinks. Three beauty finished their dance
and much older, not that nice looking lady came on a stage with a little tank
full of water. She placed the tank under her intimate parts and six little fishes came
out, swimming into the tank. WHAT? Oh yes, out of her vagina… later she did it
with two little turtles, and after it with a little yellow bird!!!??? and yes, all of it from down there…
Between her acts there were those beautiful
girls dancing and playing with the guys who weren’t too disgusted to lay down on
stage without their clothes, covered with little towel…
 |
| photos are from the street, no pictures allowed at ping pong |
Actually, those moments were fun and much needed to recover from what
you previously saw… Then there was another old lady with very angry face who
lay down on the floor while a guy was standing holding balloons and she
released arrows from her vagina, hitting straight into the balloons. At one point she came back to the stage and pulled out of her intimate parts 2
meter long cord, on which every 5 cm, was a razor blade attached. That was
too scary to even look, but to prove that razors weren’t fake she cut a candle
after pulling them all out. I have to say it made me speechless, I mean it
takes lots of time to learn how to do all this things, it’s not like they were
born with that talent… Couldn’t that energy and effort be used for something
more constructive? After tipping
the waitress, we tipped the show as well and that got us a green light to
leave this disgusting premises. We went and sat
on the beach; it took us one hour before starting to talk, as we both needed
fresh air to take away those images from our heads.
Few days of
holidays we still had, we decided to spend it by being lazy on the beach during day and
night time? Well, nothing can beat simple romantic candle dinner holding hands,
whispering about love while looking into the eyes of person you love the most.
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